Balancing Family and Your Career - Part 1

If there's one thing that every parent struggles with, its the ability to balance family and a career.

One part of us longs for the challenges and sense of accomplishment that can come from doing a job we love while the other half feels an undeniable need to spend some quality time with our family.

And that doesn't even address a social life or personal time. So, how can we balance it all?

There was a time in a previous life when my career was everything to me. I worked 12 to 15 hour days, 7 days a week and took work home with me when I finally peeled myself away from the office. In fact, I was so dedicated that when my husband begged me to take a four-day weekend and head to the beach, I agreed on the condition that I would work through the night before our day of departure.

And that's exactly what I did.

While he slept on a couch in our conference room, I worked through the night until six the next morning. He drove to the beach, I slept in the car. And I was a nervous wreck the entire time.

Had I forgotten to do something? Did I send that email? Did I leave enough notes and instructions so that I wouldn't be missed?

I lived and breathed that job, believing that "getting ahead" was the equivalent to success.

What I discovered however, was that my success and my success within the company were actually two different things. When the company didn't perform the way the shareholders thought it should, someone had to be at fault. And since we all know what rolls downhill, I'll just say that I was at the bottom of that hill and was suddenly saddled with the blame for a number of things I had no authority to change.

Was it fair?

No, but I learned an invaluable lesson that I've never forgotten: the only person that is ever truly looking out for your best interest is you. Not your boss, not your co-workers... YOU.

Management will never complain that you're working too many hours. They'll never suggest that you go home and spend some time with family and friends. In fact, if you let them, they'll convince you that the only way to true happiness is by putting in more hours and getting that carrot stick of a promotion that they keep dangling just out of your reach.

But the truth is, the company existed before you got there and they'll exist long after you're gone. It doesn't matter if you're the best worker they've ever had, your "best" will never quite be good enough. At least, not if your personal goals and objectives don't directly mesh with theirs.

No, I'm not slamming the Corporate World. Well, okay.. maybe just a little. But its nothing personal.

And that's the problem.

Our society's definition of success has fallen far away from the family-oriented community we pretend to be. We're always on the lookout for the bigger, better thing and we wanted it yesterday. Yes, there may be companies out there that are truly family-friendly but they're far and few between and unfortunately, greatly outweighed by the ones that aren't.

So, now that I've vented, I'll get down from my soap-box and get back to the question at hand: how can you balance work and family?

Let's start by looking at what you love to do.